P V Sindhu????

Was busy and couldnt do this post sooner. But I wanted it to make to the August post so doing this in a last minute rush.

Lets talk about this pic that was shared on FB. Firstly, a big salute to all those women who maintain a balance between culture and modernity. But there's no harm if a lady cant manage to do it. I never saw anyone raising a brow when a man cant drape a dhoti or manage traditional attire. Seriously! most of them prefer to wear jeans to the temples. I dont have a problem with that and neither do i have a problem when a woman doesnt wear a saree or traditional attire to the temple.

Talking about feminism, its not about defying culture but it is about giving women the freedom to make their choices and hold on to their decisions. Feminism also doesn't mean that women and men can do similar tasks with same dexterity because they were born to be different. It is for us to respect each others differences and shortcomings. No. It doesnt qualify women for reservation. There is a huge list of Dos and Dont's for women. In the name of tradition, the women face lots of restrictions. Restrictions, that most of the times come in the way of their dreams, goals, aims and aspirations. Culture and traditions are man made and keep changing with time. The society has curtailed the Sati system. It has accepted that a woman need not burn herself in her husband's pyre. Then how difficult is it to accept that a woman needs to live the life she dreams of? why don't we accept that she need not kill her dreams and ambitions for the unknown prince charming or the almost extinct knight in the shining armor?

The pic of P V Sindhu holding a Bonam and going to temple in traditional attire is being shared on FB trying to tell every other woman to learn something from her. How about sharing Sachin Tendulkar going on an exotic vacation with his family? Comparision doesnt go well with men right? So does it with women as well. Next we would say Sakshi Malik can lift twice her body weight, every other woman should also try and do it. No Sir! it doesnt work that way.

I Wouldn't mind wearing a pallu over my head or making hell lot of sacrifices  for everyone around me until i lose my identity if it was not for my son. I feel that he deserves to know the real me. I want to make the path of the woman of his life less difficult by not setting wrong or impractical expectations for her.

I know i Know these days my blogs are not very interesting atleast to most of my friends. But i promise  i will post a story next. Thanks for hanging on

Finally, something important

This article is in the interest of the general public and most if it is based on the experiences I get to know from those around me. I don’t intend to point my fingers at anyone in general, for I know everyone is right with their own perspective. 

Having done with the crude disclaimer, here follows the article. It’s the most discussed topic these days and is more popular than the Trump vs Hillary chats. Its strange in the most weirdest way that when we are at the peaks of the feminist revolution, the actual cause of misery in a woman’s life is another woman. And that woman comes in the form of an in law, a Mother in Law (MIL) or a Daughter in Law (DIL). We can’t generalize and say that all MILs are cruel and bossy or say that all DILs are at fault as we find that few DILs we know are actually as good and sweet as nectar, and few MILs are too soft spoken and forgiving in nature. On keen observation, we may also notice that the sweet DILs are actually our daughters or sisters and the forgiving MILs are either our mothers or aunts. As I said, everyone is good as an individual but things get worse when they try to influence or rule over others lives. Sort of holding the reigns of others lives. There is always this generation gap and is actually difficult for a 50 or 60 year old to think on terms with a 30 year old lady and vice versa. And this is not a reason enough to hate each other.

When I get to meet my female friends, their common complaint is that it’s remarkably tough to juggle between office and home. But neither of them would stop working and sit at home because they prefer office over home where they are under the constant vigil of their MILs. Sometimes, I see women coming to office despite their illness and the reason behind it makes me sad. Back home, they are expected to toil constantly and have no hopes of finding any rest. And needless to say, they prefer office over home. 

Yet few cases I see the couple are often picking fights under the influence of their relatives. The woman complains her husband being influenced by his mom and the man complains his wife being influence by her mom. Its very easy to fall prey to such influences. I would request everyone to just sharpen up all your 5 senses, if possible even common sense and 6^th sense and use them first to drive some sense into your brains. This is meant for both women and men. Have your own individuality and try to draw conclusions from what you hear and see rather than believing every illogical and unsensical thoughts of your bad influential relatives. And don’t compare your spouse with your mom or dad. Remember that every individual is unique. 

I also find few MILs and DILs getting on very well and feel so happy and am often tempted to put a kaala tika on them. Yes, there are every different possible combinations of people living around us, it is upto us to work on our relations and do what suits the best for us but not at the cost of others interests. Learn to compromise before you expect others to compromise for you. Learn to appreciate others when you expect others to appreciate you. Life is too precious and rare a gift to lose for something so unworthy. Remember, there are counselors out there ready to help in such matters. 

I don’t want to go on with this melodramatic tone. As an under note I would like to add, there is a woman whom I admire and adore a lot. Someone, who is constantly burning like the wick of a candle trying to brighten up the lives of those around her, never giving up. If you think, you know that lady, please help her and share her burden, for you know that she is too precious to lose. PLEASE.